Lonely.
 

I don't know how to express this but I just feel..Lonely. Like I really don't understand how but I just feel alone. I guess its cause I'm so shy to speak to new people in my school and I end up pushing people away because I 1)shy to speak and 2) not enough confidence to try speaking. I just need help. Pretty sure all you Graalians have quite a few friends. Well you looking at one who is quiet, sits by himself at lunch, and sometimes try to speak to new people only to choke on words and end up saying nothing. I just don't know what to do.

Girlfriend needed?

You don't need friends 'in real life'. Internet friends are all you need. Once you realize that, you will be much happier in life.

Dr. 5hift, PhD diagnoses you with Graal-deficiency.

Thing is I'm 17 and never had one like ever. I just don't seem to have the features girls are looking for.

Not true and not helping either.


No...This happens to me IRL even before I knew about Graal.

Dr. 5hift, PhD recommends you try striking a conversation with people who sit around you.

If you hear something that you know or recognize from those around you, try entering the conversation.

That's a good place to start.

In fact, it is very true, and very helpful. You are just stuck in an outdated way of thinking.

It'll just take some time to understand this truth. It becomes much easier to realize this when you leave the madhouse that is 'high school' and enter the 'working' world.

Getting involved with school clubs and sports is also very effective.

As for being able to talk to people, which, unfortunately, is still a necessary skill in life, I disassociate my personality from my actions. 'Act'.

I try my best to understand contexts and emotions based upon my experience watching television and movies, but really, body cues and facial expressions still usually go straight over my head. I still haven't figured that part out yet... but at least I can communicate my ideas to colleagues when necessary.

Dunno how feasible of an option that is for you to be able to talk to others, but it works for me.

Based upon your posts on Graalians, you really have no problem creating the words to share your inner thoughts, you just have trouble with actually 'speaking' it.

Side Note: I've noticed in my experiences, that in 'real life', people have a better opinion of you if you just speak often, regardless of what you are actually saying. 'Quiet' & 'Shy' is interpreted as conceited and stuck-up, and thus breeds contempt towards you.

Lel ur loser irl. But seriously get a gf, don't like how you look? Change. Work out. Brush your teeth, have good hygiene. Actually try to dress nice, have a confident vibe. Bam ur not a ****** anymore.

You're a loser yourself for not reading his entire post.

What sad world has people who only befriend strong, clean, fashionable, non-****** people???

Oh right I forgot...

Just try to be a nice guy and not stress over aesthetics.

Oi... So glad I'm outta high school. This sorta spiel is toxic in my mind. In the 'working' world, people are far more understanding of different life styles.

Just because he feels lonely, doesn't necessarily mean he wants a girlfriend. Around 1% of the US Population is Asexual. They still desire 'friends', but have no need for a 'girl/boyfriend'. (In this case, xSupah may indeed actually want a girlfriend, it just annoys me how that was the first response)

Tare, never did I say I want a girlfriend. Blah I agree with your points but honestly I see so many people in my school talk plans for spring break and how they gonna go out while me do nothing. Like out of 1,400 kids in my school I only got like one friend there..Just one. And he's not even in my same lunch period while many other kids are. And can I try speaking to them with my confidence level? Not even in a million years.

Well you're absolutely right. With that confidence level, you'll never meet the need of human connection. The good news is, is that you can become confident instantly simply by changing your physiology and your amount of certainty. Fixing your posture and standing upright with your shoulders back and walking with a sense of purpose not only will increase your confidence, but it'll boost you in other areas of your life you never would've imagened.

You frighten me with your loneliness, ask Dusty hes the love guru.

First you don't need a girlfriend to not be lonely.

Second if you have to change your look/attitude drastically than your girlfriend is probably not for you.

And Supah, how much time do you spend with family? People at school may reject you, but your family is always with you! (Unless there are circumstances like divorces, drugs, etc involved.)

stop crying and feeling down on yourself. This may sound like me being a ****, but honestly, how is complaining about it going to make it better? You're asking a community that has by far proven to be highly immature and highly unsocially accepted for advice?

You want friends? Make them. You lack confidence? Get some. All of this is in your mind, people can give you advice and tips but the only time it will ever change is when you look in the mirror, accept that not everyone is going to like you and walk out your front door with a smile on your face and welcome those that do. I swear, I don't know how people can feel lonely in this time of humanity. Ffs go find someone else that feels lonely and make them happy as well.

You only live once, don't live feeling self loathing

Chime in with others. Meet your friend's friends. Laugh at your insults. And be you. Your are a good guy.

It's all in your head. There is one acceptable reason as to why you can't express your feelings towards others, and that reason is because you're telling yourself, I can't talk to that person because I'm too shy. Then, you don't talk to them because you think you're too shy. It's a vicious circle, and it won't stop until you start. Shyness is in your head. How can you expect to progress when you keep telling yourself you're too shy or you're not socially adept and do nothing? If you overhear someone talking about something you know anything about, say something. It's not hard at all to find someone with common interests. Just go out there and meet people. You can't expect other people to meet you. You have to do it yourself.

Get out of your comfort zone. It's not that bad. Give it a shot, you'll surprise yourself.

As true as it can get. Just go out there and surprise your self. Whats the worst that can happen?

This guys actually starting to get annoying with his sob stories. No one cares if you're lonely. You need to man up.

Haven't really read this thread but people should recognize the difference between feeling lonely and being alone.

AWW YIS

http://puu.sh/7VH1Q.jpg

JERKS but I agree
Lol what a deek but I also agree



note: theres a difference between friends and acquaintances. 95% of people you consider friends are actually acquaintances, your only friends are the ones that are really there for you when you need them and does are rare to find.

Introvert alert.

How many extroverts do you think there really are on Graal rather than the self-proclaimed ones? My guess would be not a whole lot... I wouldn't even consider myself to be an extrovert, yet from don't believe I'm a complete introvert since I like to use qualities of both spectrums. (Extrovert via confidence, introvert via interests, etc. There are many more qualities I can embody from both.) But I highly doubt that most of us here are strongly outgoing ourselves. Plus there's a lot of benefits of being introverted that no one ever talks about. Society just likes to paint a negative image on things they don't understand. It's easy to get caught in the fallacy that introversion is always a harmful thing.

My sob stories? Do you even see me crying? And your right yep no one cares but I'm sharing it anyway. Problem? Then you know theres a lot more threads then this one.

As for all the others being 17 and an introvert isin't exactly what I want. I mean I know when I start college in the fall of this year I'm going have to speak up. Sure as Talon said yes its in my head but sadly that is how my mindset is. For all who said I'm annoying, I apologize but I just need to express how I feel because in all honestly it's annoying me myself how shy I get around people I never met.

If you want someone to listen, shoot me a PM.

Heh, you have have the wrong idea about what college is. There is in fact LESS pressure to 'speak up'. No one cares if you lock yourself in your room to study or play games.

I am of the opposite opinion from most of the replies in this thread. I still think that you are better off realizing that there is nothing wrong with you and be happy, instead of trying to drastically change the person that you are.

However, I completely understand why you are concerned. I had many of the same concerns when I was in high school because of the awful ideals of most high schoolers. It didn't help that I am asexual, and could not understand my peers, to whom sexuality was such an important factor in their lives. But like I said, things got a lot better when I got out of school.

I never said it was a bad thing. I am introverted myself.
Everyone is over analyzing his "I'm lonely" behavior when its just typical introversion.

alright, how about this; http://www.wikihow.com/Overcome-Shyness
Its too long to type!

I'm an extrovert, but I doubt many people would believe that, haha.

Listen to Talon and Jester's advise.

Being shy and lacking confidence has nothing to do with being introvert or extravert. Im a introvert and I don?t have those issues(well not to that extreme). Introverts prefer to be alone with their thoughts because they prefer it that way not because they cant figure out a way to change it.

The thing with giving out advise is that they need to direct him in the proper direction to where he might get help.

I'm a mess all around when it comes to loneliness.

To be in solitude would be nice. I am an introvert too.

^

introvert ftw

Drop your left nut and **** the hottest bitch at your school.
Quit crying.

^ fail

^---double fail
what if he cant afford her?:P

I dont think you know the true definition of a man.

I'm not talking about the **** you find in Urban Dictionary or whatever it may be either.

Join clubs and meet people who share the same interests as you, if you choke laugh it off or just ask them questions about themselves, you'll hardly find anyone who doesn't like talking about themselves especially girls. :P

It's not that you don't have the 'features' girls are looking for, it's how you express yourself and lack of confidence that girls can see. Seriously, just looking confident/what Blueh posted can make a hell of a difference, and if you're not happy with how you look then change it (hit the gym, change your hairstyle, change your clothing style etc.)

From what i've read about you in your threads you seem to be in a dark place and looking for a way to fit in. If I were you, I'd use this and turn it into positive energy for change, once you change and get a bit of confidence I promise you life will change for the better as well, you'll one day walk to school and people will think holy ****! :P

If not now, I promise you this as well, and anyone will tell you this that high school/secondary school is awful lol, so much drama and ugh just horrible, but once you get older and are hanging around with an older crowd/college this will change, you'll find people that like you for you and share the same interests.

man does not = man up

Every morning I love to always wake up listening to a motivational track or parade around the house to The Imperial March (I'm serious lol), and say a brief prayer of thanks for having another day of good health and opportunities. When you start your day on a positive note, everything usually follows suit. You have more energy, more drive and more passion to the things you do. I think I mentioned this earlier in this thread, or in another thread that I go to bed at 12AM and wake up at 4AM everyday. Why? It's the lifestyle I choose, not forced upon me. I'm not studying last minute or rushing to complete my homework. I'm doing the things that I want to do to improve my mind, body, heart and soul. I believe that an object in motion, stays in motion and an object in rest, stays in rest. Whatever you're doing, as soon as you get started and keep on going the rest will flow naturally. Likewise, the longer you don't get started, the harder it will be to get started. I still experience this a lot in some areas of my life I'm trying to improve upon, but I'm hoping that you don't just read these posts and not learn from them and not apply them. Knowledge is not power. Knowledge is potential power. Using that knowledge to your maximum abilities in all aspects, is power.

I joined several clubs when I entered high school. Marching band helped me open up to people.

I may have a unique perspective as I am much older than most people here "28 to be exact". But don't try to be friends with everyone or win popularity contests, it will do more harm than good in the long run and maybe I am just cynical but the vast majority of people are just plain bad and you don't want to associate with them. Plus the quality of humans has exponentially dropped since the 90's and early 2000's. I recommend you search your own soul and character and search the soul and character of those around you and find a few good friends you can count on. Also the club idea isn't bad so long as the people are cool. I was in an Anime club in College, we actually walked around wearing cat ears and playing anime with boobs on classroom projectors and other cool stuff. I was also a member of the LaRouche Youth Movement walking around passing out posters calling **** Cheney a war criminal. Oh how I miss those zany fun times. Know thyself friend, then know everyone else, then you can win all your battles in life.

If you do try and look for friends, don't act totally different than who you actually are. Be yourself, find people with the same interests. Life begins at the end of your comfort zone.
Talking to new people is that one step that will take you out. Try and also change your attitude if you can. Try and change the things you do now for the better, so that when later down in life you don't feel disappointed that you didn't take a chance that you could have.

It doesn't really matter how much confidence you have. If all youre doing when you go home is getting on your computer youre not gonna make friends irl if thats what you do. Sign up for a sport or something, join a club. You're not gonna become more social here.

try boxing

https://www.google.com/maps/search/a.../data=!3m1!4b1

if gyms are to expensive check the community centers around your area.

If your lonely... talk to people. If your too shy... Talk in a mirror, get used to talking to people. If certain things turn you shy, there called Trigger points note down your Trigger points. Now think of ways to overcome those triggers. Practice in a mirror, or to a family member. When you think your ready, give it a shot!

That sounds intriguing. I think I've heard that term used before. Where did you learn it?