Or, we round up all of the leading hat chasers. Bludgeon their skulls until unconscious. Drag them into an Hell-striking cellar of a dirty meat processing plant. Crudely dress them as their characters and give them styrofoam noob shields but real swords and set up a background photoshoot (designed by one of our skilled GFX team members) to resemble a familiar Graalian landscape. Then we point a camera towards them and have them fight to the death until the last one remains. We give the survivor a poorly made hat with the phrase "1k" faintly etched into the stiching, yet legible enough to see. We have him wear the hat in front of the camera then promise his release. As soon as he turns to leave, we execute him on camera. Then we do a zoom in on his half-decayed expression before cutting to black.

I like my idea a lot better. But that's just my opinion