Hi everyone.

I need some advice with a little thing I got going on. Over the past three years I've become really good friends with this girl over Graal. In the past year we started Skyping and she's just a really amazing friend. I can tell her anything, really. Recently, I began to notice that I was feeling something inside of me about her. I didn't think the feelings were sincere, so I simply pushed them aside. However, a few weeks ago I couldnt keep denying it and I admitted to myself that I had a crush on this girl.

Now, I don't like labels, but I am attracted to both men and women. Also, there's a difference between having a crush and being madly in love with someone. I'm not in love with her, but I definitely feel something more than a feeling of friendship there (a crush). I told her, and she was completely fine with it. She said it did not change the way she saw me and said that she was not weirded out by this. I'm assuming she isn't lying (if she felt uncomfortable she probably would have told me, I hope). However, I can't shake this strange feeling off. We are still close friends, and she doesnt see me in that way (completely understandable), and I'm fine with that, too. However, recently I've been second guessing myself. She has showed me a few photos of herself, and let me just say that she definitely isn't ugly. However, whenever I think about this stuff, I seem to punish myself with thoughts that I think of. "Friends aren't supposed to feel that way, you know." "How can you find her cute? You're her friend, and friends don't think of each other as 'cute' like that." "So what is she? Your friend or your crush? You can't have it both ways, and friends don't think about each other as much as you do." "You don't find this weird? She's your friend and you have a crush on her?"

And then sometimes, I don't seem to feel as strongly about her as I sometimes do. Like, it comes and it goes (sorta, I mean I never stop having a crush on this girl, but the level of how much I like her seems to change). Sometimes it's like, "This is just a phase." and other times it's "You definitely like this girl." Also, when she showed me a photo of herself, I sometimes say "Omg she is so cute!", and other times when I see it I'll go "oh, yeah, she's cute." Sometimes it's like "Do you actually have a crush on this girl?" and other times it's "You definitely have a crush on this girl." In short, sometimes I feel butterflies, sometimes I don't, the feeling just seems to come and go. I'm just worried that my feelings aren't even sincere most of the time.

She says it doesn't bother or weird her out (I'm taking her word for this), but I'm constantly having these thoughts. It's me who is thinking of this as weird. How can I keep myself from doing that? I just want to be able to accept how I feel and know that even though I have a crush on her, she's my friend. What should I do?

tldr; im a girl, i like a girl from online, i told her and she's fine with it but i constantly question myself about it, unsure how to keep myself from questioning myself and how to completely understand my feelings