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Oh who would I be if I didn't offer a word of caution to this tale? Be careful with that sex before marriage thing … Love burns like an insatiable craving addiction of heroin; allowing one to addict you to their irreplaceable details in such a way without full-on commitment is almost suicide … There is an unspoken rule in these arrangements based on fallacy: Evaluate me like a tool, use me, shame me, and build a case—then hate me and accuse me of unlovability when you're ready to "move on".
Sometimes … Heartache, leads to bang bang with a barrel … If you know what I mean.
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Yeah you're right. I once hooked up with a guy I met on Grindr, and we hooked up 5 times total. I felt his comments like "you're so cute" and "I really like you" were heartwarming and he was looking for more. The next day after he slept over in my bed with me, I asked him to be exclusive and he said "I don't know right now. Let's talk about it later" and he left. Still have a hole in my heart that, when watching sad videos or movies, I still think of him a little and it crushes me.
I love my boyfriend, I do, just that I have an underlying heartache from hookup dude.
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As cute as that is, doesn't matter. You think you know someone and they change. Hooking never got me anywhere so I can't speak for that but I wouldn't say it's necessarily the age that people wanna hook up. They just want pleasure. I've seen plenty of couples who have lasted since freshman year high school lol. When it comes down to the core, we all want someone and sometimes people work and sometimes they don't. Trust me, I speak from hell of experiences.
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Honestly, I know things don't work out. I've dated both guys and girls (long story short, I thought I was asexual for the longest time until I experimented with a guy). I'm not expecting that were going to grow 85 and die together, but I like being in a relationship. It's assuring and I can get cuddles all the time :3
Live in the now. Not going to be worried it won't work out, just take it slow and enjoy the ride.