![]() |
|
|
| Poll Results: shave it? | |||
| 67.39% |
yes
|
||
| 32.61% |
no
|
||
| Voters: 46. You may not vote on this poll | |||
|
|
|
Topic Tools |
|
12-24-2012
|
16 |
|
Registered User
Join Date: Dec 2012
Posts: 424
|
Try to burn one by one, should be the best solution.
|
|
12-24-2012
|
17 |
|
Custom User Title
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Australia
Posts: 2,534
|
|
|
12-24-2012
|
18 |
|
the KattMan
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: United States
Posts: 4,204
|
|
|
12-25-2012
|
19 |
|
Former iEra Staff
Join Date: Nov 2011
Posts: 1,722
|
use them to make a carpet.
|
|
12-25-2012
|
20 |
|
Registered User
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Egypt
Posts: 2,939
|
There's this place where they shave your anus' hair. Weird that you made this thread right after I've watched Bruno. |
|
06-22-2013
|
21 |
|
Registered noob
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Rondoletti Wafer Sticks
Posts: 780
|
Manly advice
Funny **** i found on another forum.. i thought i'd share this with you d00dez. BUTT HAIR Don't Shave That Hair!!! I have recently made a mistake in my life, and I offer my story to you, that you may learn from my error. It all started, as many things do, with me having trouble ****ting. No, I was not constipated; this was not a regularity problem but a matter of technique. It seems my butt-hair had grown to such a length that tiny grogans were constantly getting tied up in the matted jungle between my buttcheeks. It led to much frustration, with me KNOWING that I still had something to drop, but unable to shake the tenacious turd loose from its butthair dwelling. Eventually I would have to do two things: either reach down with some paper and try to pinch off the lingering loaf (which required careful precision to avoid smearing the creature all over my rear, especially since I had no way of seeing what I was doing) or just go for broke, start wiping, and hope that I could remove all the leftover fecal matter before the toilet paper reached its Can't-Be-Flushed threshold. I was contemplating this problem, when I had what seemed at the time to be a bright idea. "Hey! This is my butt and my butt-hair, right? So why don't I just eliminate all the hair, and then my grogans will flow out like beer from a keg!" I said to myself. It is a statement that will go down in history with a lot of other regretted statements. "How many Indians could there be?" said by General Custer. "Looks like a good day for a drive!" by JFK. "There! America On-Line now has complete Usenet access!" by some idiot system tech. Such was my anal shaving idea. I performed the operation that night, with a cheap disposable razor and a towel to sit on. Starting from the bottom, and shaving from the crack to the cheeks, I began the arduous process of ridding my butt of hair. Occassionally, I would have to clean the razor of accumulated hair and miscellaneous slime, which I did by wiping it on the towel. Slowly, my twin mounds and the between-ravine began to resemble the hairless cheeks of a newborn baby. Finally, I wiped the razor one last time, and surveyed my work. The towel was covered with a pile of hair. My butt was smooth as ivory. I smiled, satisfied, thinking my troubles were over. Little did I know. I now have a great respect for anal-hair. Like everything in this world God created, it has its mighty purpose in existence. It was only after I had removed it that I started to learn how much I had been taking it for granted. For one, it provides friction. I learned this the next day, when I walked out into the sun heading for class. After climbing two flights of stairs and starting to sweat, I started to notice something unpleasant. The sweat was accumulating in my crack, and was causing the unpleasant sensation of my two buttcheaks sliding past each other with every step. I thought about going to the bathroom and wiping it off, but had to get to class. Eventually, I thought, it would dry. Unfortunately, it did dry, but only after mingling with the microscopic poo- molecules lingering around my brown starfish. When I stood up after class, my cheeks were stuck together with a slimy sticky ****/sweat combination. As I made my way back to my dorm, it started to itch. God-DAMN, did it itch! Felt like a swarm of ants was making its way up and down my crack. Fighting to keep from jamming my hand down there and scratching away, I rushed back to the dorm. Unfortunately again, this exertion caused me to sweat, and when I finally reached my room, my cheeks were sliding back and forth against each other like a pair of horny cane-toads. I quickly dropped my pants, and attempted to dry my butt off by sticking it in front of a fan and spreading my cheeks. As I pulled the two mounds of flesh apart, a horrible stench burst free and filled the room. Every dog within a 4 block radius started to howl. I had it worst of all, as the ripe aroma of festering ****/sweat went into the fan and blew back into my face. I fought to keep from heaving. And as I sat there, fighting vomit, my butt cheeks spread and dripping, with the concentrated aroma of my body odor mixed with the tangy smell of my own **** blowing right into my face, I had only one thought: "It will be like this until the hair grows back. Weeks." Later on, trying to deal as best I could, wiping my butt at every opportunity, I discovered another wonderful use for butt-hair - ventilation. I attempted to launch a fart, only to have it get stuck between my buttcheeks. Apparently, with no hair, the two pink twins can get vacuum sealed together, and the result was a frustrating fart that slid up and down between my cheeks like a lost gerbil. As if that wasn't enough, I am now enduring further torture. As anyone who has ever shaved anything knows, when hair is first growing in, it comes in as stubble. Imagine your butt having the texture of a brillo pad. Well, that is what I am dealing with now. It is a hellish torture, and there are many times when I just look out the window and contemplate why I shouldn't just jump out and get it all over with in one fleshy splat, rather than endure this constant agony. Guys, DON'T SHAVE YOUR BUTT-HAIR! |
|
06-22-2013
|
22 | |
|
Hyrule Knights
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: In your head 24/7
Posts: 6,348
|
don't mean to be a drag brolio but this was already put in the community. Link to thread http://www.graalians.com/forums/show...ight=butt+hair Post that mentions it |
|
|
06-22-2013
|
23 |
|
Registered User
Join Date: Sep 2011
Posts: 963
|
Oh i'm in this part of Graalians again.
|
|
06-22-2013
|
24 |
|
Graalian
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Belle Isle
Posts: 4,481
|
|
|
06-22-2013
|
25 |
|
Auto Enthusiast
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Queens, NY
Posts: 424
|
I know I've been on the Internet for far too long when I realized that I've already read this for the sixth time, on several different sites.
|
|
06-22-2013
|
26 |
|
Registered User
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Egypt
Posts: 2,939
|
iChronic, we never talked, but I always see you come online, do a post and disappear, like this Swedish guy in the goodbye threads who says the same thing over and over, like Manbearpig and that Koolaid fellow.
|
|
06-23-2013
|
27 |
|
Registered noob
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Rondoletti Wafer Sticks
Posts: 780
|
guys, this is me typing OLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOOLLOLOLOOLOLLOLOLOOLLOLE LELELELELELELELELLOLOLOLOL http://awesomegifs.com/wp-content/uploads/internet-typing1.gif (Unsupported image host) |
|
06-23-2013
|
28 |
|
Who knows?
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: California
Posts: 1,716
|
why the **** would you bump this?
|
|
06-23-2013
|
29 |
|
michael
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Hyrule
Posts: 3,511
|
I believe one of these are in order: http://i2.kym-cdn.com/entries/icons/original/000/000/128/slowpoke_pokemon.gif (Unsupported image host) |
|
06-23-2013
|
30 |
|
Enguard & Alumni
Join Date: Sep 2011
Posts: 5,773
|
Cool bump. I did it my senior year of high school because I played basketball and the male body is disgusting when hairy and sweaty, and it was a huge mistake. If you're going for it anyway, get it waxed.
|